This video is part of the Born in Hell Video series regarding the abuse I suffered as a child at the hands of my parents and a sibling. This video details the CSA, Child Sexual Abuse and Incest I was forced to endure at 8 years old. This video is EXPLICIT and GRAPHIC and I advise that you watch at your own discretion. The topics of child abuse and child sexual abuse can make people very uncomfortable and can trigger survivors of abuse. Please make the right decision for yourself. I am 7 years old in this photo. My birthday is late in the year so I would be turning 8 before the new year. This is the last year I would be a virgin as my brother began to sexually abuse me that winter. I suffered repeated child rape, sodomy and sexual abuse for nearly one year from January 1974 until October that year. My mom knew about the incest, because I had developed a bad infection as a result of the damage done and I began to get sick. After the third sexual assault rape I told my mom and she did nothing to help me except to say that it was "my problem" and not "her problem" and for me to "wrap myself up like a mummy at night with my blankets". That was her answer. She turned a blind eye, and a blind ear to the sexual assaults my brother inflicted on me. I sat in bathtubs of rose coloured bloody water, holding my legs, rocking back and forth in so much pain from the rape and sodomy. I was afraid I would die, and then after so many more rapes and assaults on my body, I was hoping I would die. The damage done to my body was irreparable even if I had decided as an adult to have reconstructive surgery. I was made barren by my brother who was 21 years old at the time of the CSA, he was about 6'5" tall and weighed around 200 lbs. The damage to my mind and heart and spirit and soul left me wanting to die. My mom was abusing me severely at this time, beating me with heavy objects and cracked my head open with the wooden handle of a meat mallet and then beat me in the kitchen. I realised at this time that my mom was truly trying to hurt me and that I was just a punching bag for her. I was made to take it, deal with it, be okay with it. If I cried I was beaten again until I stopped crying. If I said anything I was beaten again for "opening my G'damn mouth". My mom called me a whore because my brother raped me and my brother called me "his whore" while raping me. I began to shut down at this point in my life and began to hate my self, my family and life itself. Comments are closed.
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I want to thank everyone for tuning in and supporting my work through the years! As always I continue to place a warning on my shows dealing with Child Abuse Prevention and Adult Survivor Issues, please LISTEN AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION! IF YOU ARE UNDER AGE AND OR SENSITIVE TO THE TOPIC AND ISSUES SURROUNDING CHILD ABUSE OF ANY TYPE, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, SEXUAL ASSAULT, SEXUAL EXPLOITATION AND ANY RELATED TOPICS TO VIOLENCE, PLEASE DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS SHOW. WE ARE ALL RESPONSIBLE FOR OUR OWN CHOICES. MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE FOR YOURSELF. THANK YOU! Human rights advocate, child rights advocate! Promoter of human rights for men, women, and children. I am not a professional counselor or a professional legal adviser and I have no professional certificates in these fields. This is not a professional show. The information and resources on these shows is from the web, and the accuracy is only as accurate as the originator's material was. Please make the right decision for yourself and listen at your own discretion. Minors and under age children must have parental/adult consent to listen to my shows in order that they stay protected at all times. Please have an adult listen to the material first so they can help you with the decision as to whether you should be listening to my shows or not depending on age appropriateness. Child Safety and Protection is my first priority. Thank you! |